Boundaries!!

Hey everyone,

I’ve been taking a hiatus from the blog for a while. I honestly didn’t feel like writing anything and I don’t believe in doing some just for the sake of doing it. However, now I am feeling the pull to write and share again, so here I go! Thank you all for understanding the ebb and flow. Today I am writing about boundaries. Honoring them for ourselves as well as respecting other’s and the boundaries that they have for themselves.

This topic has been very relevant in my life lately. Setting boundaries has been a hard thing for me to do throughout my life. Sticking to them has been even more difficult for me to do. I don’t like making other people feel bad or uncomfortable, but I’ve noticed that when I put others wants and needs in front of my own it usually ends in me feeling drained emotionally and physically. This doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t put others in front of ourselves sometimes, I think it is great doing things for others! But it’s when we are constantly putting others in front of ourselves that the situation can turn sour.

Not having boundaries can lead to us feeling bad about ourselves and our ability to stand up for what we really want in life. Sometimes it is good to say no! To take time away to focus on self-care, following our dreams, or even dreaming about what we want. But if we are constantly saying yes to things we know we don’t want, just because we are worried about what others may think, we take away from ourselves. Whether this be energy, moments, time alone, hobbies, etc.

Society likes to tells us that we are selfish if we put ourselves first instead of others, but we are actually being selfish if we let others dictate how we want to live our lives. Selfish in a way that we are not truly our best selves when we don’t follow the boundaries we have set up for ourselves. If we don’t feel our best inside; if we feel depleted energetically and emotionally within; than this will for sure show up in what we project to our outside world.

It can be difficult to set boundaries because we have fears about missing out on certain events, fears about what others will think of us, etc. But when we do this others will know what to expect of us. They will learn to respect us because we respect ourselves and our needs. If you don’t respect what you really need and want, how can you expect others to? This is a hard lesson that I had to learn!

Remembering to respect the boundaries that others have set for themselves is an important aspect as well. A lot of people put their happiness in others, again this all comes back to attachments! Ah, everything really is connected! But something I’ve been learning also recently is that real love means letting someone live their life how THEY want to, and not how we think they should. If they want to do something alone, take up a new hobby, meditate every morning, then we should let them do what they would like! And if that doesn’t include us, then we have to accept that. None of us belong to anyone, none of us own anything, and when we act like we do, it can sometimes feel suffocating for ourselves and for others.

Setting boundaries may look like choosing to stay home and practice yoga instead of going out with friends or working on your latest project instead of binge-watching a show with your roommates. Sometimes the latter is great, but again it all comes back to balance. It all comes back to listening to ourselves, to the inner voice. It’s easy to get swept up in our outer world; in our friends, family, jobs, affiliations. It’s easy to get lost and forget what it is we actually long to do in this life, who we are/who we would like to be. But it’s important to remember that we are all human, and we all stumble, but eventually we all pick ourselves up again and have the opportunity to grow and learn from what life throws at us!

Its all a crazy journey, yet exciting! Feel free to message me or comment. Hope you all are dong well out there!

Peace humans,

Rylee

Living life with intention:

It’s all about intention! Literally everything. Why do we do the things we do? Say the things we do? Act the way we do? It’s all surrounded with our intentions in life, and a lot of us have good intentions that may be received negatively, and likewsise, some of us have bad intentions that are received positively. How can that be?! It all depends on the person receiving and the person giving. As well as the energies inbetween. Actually, this all depends on all energies since everything is energy. It’s also all about perceptions, realities, lenses, beliefs, etc. For example, someone could speak with good intentions, but another individual could interpret this to be hurtful. So even though one’s intention (in their perspective) was a good one, the receiver could interpret this in a completely different way. How confusing!!

This can be why a lot of us suffer from communication issues and are afraid to speak authentically. We fear we will say the wrong thing at the wrong time, someone will be upset with us, disagree with us, or simply not understand where we are coming from. I won’t lie, these issues are probably going to happen for the rest of your life. There really is no preventing it, some people will just interpret what you say in a different manner than you originally meant when you put the energy out in the first place. This is completely ok!! Differences are fine, various opinions can be accepted and validated.

It all comes down to YOU. As do most things. You cannot control what is going on in the outside world. Nothing. Everything is happening and flowing just as it should be, and you can flow with it too if you simply let go of your grasp to what happens/what you want to happen on the outside and instead turn your focus onto your inner self. Here is where you control what you say, act, perceive, interpret, feel, everything! Remember: no one can MAKE you feel any sort of way. No one can MAKE you do anything you don’t want to do! Only you hold the key to this. So stop worrying what others are going to think, say, and do. Instead pay attention to what you will think, say, and do. This will get you way farther on your journey to your highest self. Focusing inward and having good intentions with everything you do. Really asking yourself, “why am I actually do this?” “Is this serving me in the best possible way at this time?” “Is what I’m putting out a reflection of how I actually feel inside”?

A lot of times our ego can get the best of our good intentions and take them on a wild ride down a winding road we didn’t intend on going. But never fear, for there are always lessons to be learned at every step, on every path. If you ever afraid of speaking your truth, acting on what you think is right, or simply doing something because you want to do it, just simply stop and listen. Listen to the beating of your heart, to what it is saying to you. The heart always knows what is truly best for your highest self. Ask yourself what your true intentions are: if it is coming from the ego or the heart. Listen to your breath, your body. Your body always knows and can pick up on energies, because it IS energy. So stop, feel your feet, breath deeply into your navel center (diaphragmatic breath) (I’ll talk about this more in another post) and relax. Relaxing and taking time to really contemplate what your intentions in life are can help you to save a lot of energy in the things you do. Knowing that you are only acting, speaking and living with good intentions from your highest self; you can release your fears about what will happen in the outside world.

In the end, everything is going to be ok. Everything is already ok right now! The universe is exactly how it is supposed to be at this moment. You are exactly what you’re supposed to be in this moment. Let go and trust. Follow your heart and not your mind, live your life with good intentions. I promise you will be alright!

Feel free to comment or message me as always with any questions or just to chat!

Peace,

Rylee