Happy Monday beautiful people! I hope that you all had a lovely, aligned, and restful weekend:).
Now, getting to today’s topic!
I want to touch on the importance of investing in ourselves. This is something that is so important in our growth and especially in getting us to where we want to go. But this is also something that is so HARD for us to do.
I have been there so many times. It feels as though I am have two mini me’s on each of my shoulders that whisper in my ear, “do it” and “don’t do it”. I chalk one up to being my logical and rational mind and the other to being my emotion-centered heart. They both mean well and they both have good points for me to consider. So which to choose?
Most of the time I find myself giving in to whichever voice is louder and whichever voice invokes more fear into my bones. Most of the time I am answering to my “logical and rational me” instead of my “heart me”. I give into the fear of investing in myself because this “little me” shouts “who do you think you are spending money, time, and and energy on yourself? You’re wasting it all! You’re selfish and you should be spending it on someone or something else”.
Notice the SHOULD here.
The more conscious I have become of my internal world, my beliefs, and my habitual thoughts, the more I realize that whenever a part of me is saying “should” then that means it is not truly coming from “me”.
I understand that this may be confusing, but the way I see it is that there is a “fake me” or a “me” that was molded by the hands and opinions of society, culture, and other humans in my life. This could be more of a persona or rather the mask that I wear in the world. However, sometimes I forget to take the mask off and it is as if it becomes glued to me. The longer I wear it, the more it becomes attached to who I believe myself to be.
Unfortunately, what this persona has learned is that investing in ourselves and doing anything for ourselves (especially us women) is considered selfish and bad.
We are taught that we must give and give ourselves to others in service of the greater whole or the “machine” (we have to keep progress going after all). We do this by over-working, letting others cross our boundaries, and saying no to ourselves when we really want to say yes or yes when we want to say no.
We think that by doing this others will love us more and we will be happier, because this is what society tells us. If you follow the rules and do what others expect of you then you will be successful and life will be swell. But the more we say no to ourselves, the more alienated we become from the life that we are meant to live.
When we do not invest in ourselves (whether this be time, energy, knowledge, workshops, coaches, etc.) we are telling ourselves that we are not worthy of success and living the life that we really want to. We are telling ourselves that what we want does not matter and what matters is making sure everyone else is happy with our decisions.
This is self-sabotage people. We may not be conscious of it, but it is happening within us, and when it does it keeps us small and in cycles of disempowerment.
I was in this cycle for a while. Starting my business was exciting and I thought I was saying yes to myself. In a way I was, but I was also saying no to myself so much more. I wanted to market myself, hire a coach, and take a few workshops, but the voice inside my head kept shouting “no!”. I felt as though there was a tug-of-war going on inside of me. I felt anxious, confused and could not make a decision to save my life. It took some time and uncovering my unconscious beliefs about “who I thought I was” until I could shine the light on the “fake me” that was keeping me from saying yes and moving forward.
Once I realized what was going on and how I was letting my fears, doubts, and disempowered persona drive the wheel, I decided it was time that I truly commit to myself, my growth, and my business.
The most important thing you can do in this life is help yourself.
So many of us are running around trying to change the world, but the world is in us. Whatever we feel inside of ourselves will reflect out into the world: in our relationships, actions, jobs, etc.
The more you invest in yourself, your dreams, and your abilities, the more aligned you will be in your truth.
The more aligned you are in your truth that more compassionate, empathetic, and passionate you will be. You will share your amazing gifts (whatever they may be) with yourself and the world around you. You will show up and live life as you’re supposed to, not from the blueprint of others.
When we invest in ourselves, we invest in making the world a more authentic and beautiful place. You are not selfish for investing in your heart’s desires. You are meant to be here, take up space, and live in alignment with yourself.
The only person you actually have to answer to at the end of your life is you, so start answering to yourself now, because I promise you you will be and feel so much more fulfilled.
Thanks so much for reading and being open to receiving this from me today. Feel free to comment, share, and reach out to me!
Rylee
